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The Theran Mystique - Volume 4, Issue 6
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A Vampire's Defeat
If you ask most Therans what they're afraid of, they'll likely respond with some
of the same answers: starvation, flood, halfling Heralds - those sorts of great
dangers that threaten to overcome you when you least expect it. However, one of
the least spoken of terrors in Thera is the one that is probably the most feared
and respected of them all (besides halfling Heralds), that being the vampire.
Recently I had the (mis)fortune of being assaulted by one of Thera's darkest
brood, the vampire called Wuilan. I was minding my own Heraldly peace and all
that, when suddenly from nowhere I saw a glimmer and a flash as something very
fast flashed past my eyes. Before I could even blink, I was overcome by the
greatest feelings of warm love and ecstacy that I've ever felt. It was almost
as if I had fallen into a great whiskey vat and grown whiskey-gills.
Before I could relish the thought of being stuck in such a happy-happy state
forever, I lost my sight. I don't know what happened other than that, but I
was definitely shocked. Still, I really didn't care since I felt so good. And
boy, did I feel good. It wasn't until I got slapped by someone's hand (who I
expertly assumed to be Wuilan) that I finally snapped out of it and realized
that my life isn't anywhere NEAR that happy and fulfilling, so I must have been
dreaming.
I finally came to my senses and started running. Right, running without being
able to see where you're going is about the dumbest thing to do. I had some
gyvel potions, but stupid me had left them in my sack. Luckily I must've felt
some familiar rocks under my feet or something, since I knew exactly where I
was running to. Seringale, here I came. Went. Went? I don't know.
So I got to Seringale and ran toward the smell of Thremus. You Heralds and
patrons know what I'm talking about. Once I got there, I hired a bouncer to
protect me incase that idiot Wuilan came running. For some reason though, I
didn't see him anywhere. Oh wait, that's right - I was still blind. Finally
I heard someone yelling that Wuilan was attacking THEM instead of ME. While I
don't normally wish bad things on people (unless they're idiots and deserve
it), I was a little happy when it was someone else getting slapped and not me.
I sat there next to Thremus until I could see again, but when I could I saw
that Wuilan had died. I started looking around Seringale to see what had
happened, and I found Wuilan's corpse along the northern road. Wondering
what could've happened, I started asking around, only to find out that the
"someone" I had heard yelling was the dwarf Fanglin, apparently another of
Wuilan's "potential victims". Only this time, Fanglin got the better of him.
Gathering what I could from Wuilan's corpse so he wouldn't be as big of a threat
anytime soon, I stood by and watched as Fanglin decided that running would be a
smart decision about that time. I had to agree, since I was sure that Wuilan
would come running (or flying, as those pesky bats do) for the dwarf's hide
fairly quickly.
All in all, I didn't get to see much of the action, even though I was involved
somewhat directly in it. I still think it was funny, personally.
It seems like more and more vampires just end up getting burned when they try
to have their day in the sun. They should probably just try relaxing. I mean,
they have a lot more at stake than most other people do. When they're out for
blood, they end up looking like big suckers more often than not. It's a little
sad, I think. Maybe they just need a hug.
Gleefully yours,
Belbris
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