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Just last eve, a great slaughter of a storm Knight was reported in the
Bard's table south of Seringale. It seems the elderly known Lourn was
meaning his own business and just about to leave the goblin village when he
was ambushed by the necromancer Rhastam. The Storm giant tumbled down his
mount from the necromancer's darkening powers. As the evil mage called upon
waves of maledictions, the illithid Singolas and the dark druid Morikin came
to assist. The battle was quick and easy for the Executioner had no idea
what boulder hit him. It was reported later and I quote from Lourn "I
thought it was Stryth punishing me for my sins, Dj vu all over again". I'm
sure we have not heard the end of this battle.
Knight Leadership Dispute: A very thorough investigation by yours truly has uncovered deceit, controversy, infighting and much much more in the Halls of Valour. Recently, Executor Naydra, the Human Healer, fell for the last time (finally). With her most opportune and fortunate passing, the mantle of Executor was once again vacant for the Knights. From speaking with a couple of concerned parties, the two most senior Knights were both hoping that Lord Soluminus would grace them with the exalted mantle. Avendin the Invoker and Lourn the Stupid Berserker. Both being Guardians in rank, they extolled the virtues and qualities of a good Knight leader (In their eyes). My own opinion differs quite drastically, but this report will contain factual evidence only and none of my own hearsay, although my view is the truest. Let us start with Avendin, the Strange Mushroom creating Invoker. I spoke with him, before his hasty departure from Thera, about this issue. He told me, confidentially, that he would be taking the Knights in a new direction, once he was made leader, which was more than assured (According to him.) No longer would the Knights fight in groups, nor would they loot the unfortunates and misunderstood people they slew. No, they would deliver hugs and kisses to all those who followed a path not similar to their own. The Knight stallions which have caused so much gossip would be rented out to the city of Seringale, for use as an organized carriage service. This service would be open to all citizens and would cost a paltry sum, which would go directly into Avendin's pocket. After about two weeks had passed since Naydra's departure, Avendin fearing a mistake had been made attempted to speak with Lord Soluminus to exact his due (the Mantle of Executor of course). When Lord Soluminus did not deign to speak with him (Lord Soluminus was busy teaching class at the Immortal School of Slaying) Avendin took it as a personal affront and left Thera forever, taking with him the mushrooms he had spent his life creating. Lourn on the other hand, was quite a bit more patient than poor Avendin. When asked by myself about the vacant position, Lourn stated that if he were to be chosen as Leader (Which was also a certainty, according to him) Knights would all be forced to learn how to bodyslam, so that they may hold all the proper skills of the best Knight. Lourn passed his time waiting for the Mantle by dying repeatedly to Yours Truly, and basically making a mockery out of himself and his profession. On a side note, it might be reported that I, indeed, fell to Lourn recently. The report is a complete fabrication, and none of the events reported ever transpired. While in the middle of this interview with Lourn, he stated that he would like to see all the Gnomes of the realms be wiped out by a disease that is common with farm animals. At this point, I lost my patience, and attacked him for his insolence towards the greatest race to grace Thera, ever. At last investigation, the position of Executor is still open in the Halls of Valour, and now more people than Lourn are vying for it. Lourn is said to be stalking the Valour Castle in a rage, attacking everything that moves, in frustration. Word on the street is that if he does not receive his self proclaimed due, he will storm off and join the Gnome Army. Others in the Halls are growing weary of Lourn's displays and are thinking about selling Lourn to Lord Xavier in Darkhaven for use in the local Bawdy House. Lord Xavier is said to have already constructed a long haired, brown wig for Lourn's head to make him more attractive. I say good luck. You cannot make a rock look attractive to anything but another rock. Continued in 'eventsB' |
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